i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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