a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
