I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
