The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
don't judge my taste in strippers
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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