Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Randomize
