I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Randomize
