can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
