so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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