turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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