You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
