It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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