You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Randomize