She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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