did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
