and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
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