Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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