dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
