I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize
