My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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