Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
