I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
