hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Randomize
