Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
