I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
