I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
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