when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize