Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Randomize
