Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
