I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
