We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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