Umm I'm too high to move.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
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