Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
