so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Randomize
