ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Randomize
