but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
