she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Randomize