I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
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