I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
