so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
