Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
