Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
