That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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