Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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