ha. weirdest feeling ever. just wiped my ass with my non-dominant hand. (eating cheeseburger with right one)
Your grandmother is in heaven weeping.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Randomize
