Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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