She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Randomize
