Sry I called you an 8
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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