thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
