I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Randomize
