Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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