We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize